Friday, March 5, 2010

Withdrawal...and a note on Validity (or something like that)

Five days have passed since I left Mcleod...but it feels like a lifetime.

And now I am starting to have "weird" physical symptoms. Weird to me, anyway, because I'm not sure what's going on.
It could be as simple as coming from the Himalayan foothills down to the coast in Mumbai (altitude change).
Or because all the food and water is different.
Or because the psychic energies which swirl around Mcleod are absent, here...
The symptoms? General achiness and malaise, and lately bad stomach pains.
 I don't feel like doing anything. I just want to sit or lie around. I am tired in my body and my soul.
I want to be on familiar ground with familiar routines and comforts. When I say familiar, I mean one of two things...the familiarity of my place in the US, or the familiarity of my place in Mcleod.
I am missing my friends, I am missing the comforts of seeing the same sights and hearing the same sounds and being welcome.

I also feel a bit over-whelmed at all the work I want to do over the coming months. I have websites to build regarding the issues which are most important to me. I have so much reading/research to do regarding Tibetan  Buddhism...more in depth study of the situation of the Tibetans, in general.

Just a note, for anyone who has been reading the heated comments left by "spirit" on my previous posts:
There is clearly a lot of controversy over the issue of the Tibetan exiles. I am not an expert on the legal or political situation. In fact, I freely admit that I did not get involved in those aspects at all.
My personal experience was learning life lessons from the most beautiful people I have ever met.
Yes, clearly there are those who are taking advantage of the system, abusing their privileges. But that happens everywhere. In the US, many families live "high off the hog" on welfare and do not really need it, while others who are desperately in need can barely get the necessary aide.
I know what is true for me, I know what is true for the people I worked with.
I am NOT responsible for those who are abusing the system, nor do I condone their behavior.
I DO know that there are many who need help, and not just of the financial sort. They deserve to receive an education, to be given the chance to find employment (there are so few opportunities for this is Mcleod).
They need to know that they are not forgotten, that their beautiful culture is valued and worth saving.
Not everyone can help every cause.
I know only what is important to ME.

I breathe in, I breathe out. I let it go. I will not try to convince those who cannot be convinced, nor will I argue  with those who are angry. They have their own causes, equally important, and I pray they will make a difference.

I will be back in the US on Wednesday.
The next phase of this journey is already forming, though I do not know where the road will take me or exactly when.
But this most sacred sojourn has only just begun.

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